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[st_arkravinghazelnut]

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[st_arkintern]

This is exactly how it went down:

Maria: What are you planning on getting Liz for Christmas?
Me: I haven't decided yet. Do you have any ideas?
Maria: Have you thought about jewelry?
Me: Like what?
Maria: Well I guess that depends on how serious you guys are.

The hierarchy of jewelry goes like this: Bracelet Necklace Earrings Rings

How am I supposed to know how serious we are?

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

Past two relationships, I had THE ring on standby after the first date.

You're sixteen. Get whatever you think she'd like. Not all woman like ALL jewelry. Or any.

[st_arkintern]

Maria has known Liz a lot longer than I have. I'm sure she knows what Liz would like a lot better than I do.

[st_arkintern]

I didn't realize how big you were into commitment.

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

What can I say? Love and marriage, going together like a horse and carriage.

Also, ask. That's it.

[st_arkintern]

Shouldn't Christmas presents be a surprise, though? This is our first Christmas together as a couple and I really want it to be special.

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

Then ask Maria.

[st_arkintern]

Maria's scary.

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

Pete do you know what happened when I got Pep a make-up gift without asking first?

[st_arkintern]

What?

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

I got her a box of strawberries.

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

She was allergic.

Got tossed out of my own building.

[st_arkintern]

You didn't know she was allergic?

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

Never asked.

[st_arkintern]

Didn't you guys know one another for like 20 years?

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

You know what I wasn't big on doing for most of those? Asking questions.

[st_arkintern]

Why didn't you ask questions?

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

Because I didn't care enough to.

[st_arkintern]

Do you ask people questions now?

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

Yes. Do you?

[st_arkintern]

I mean, I'm asking questions right now, right?

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

Indeeeeeed.

Now go ask Liz.

[st_arkintern]

Okay, I will.

Did you have anything you want for Christmas?

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

Peace and goodwill towards men.

[st_arkintern]

Something I can actually give.